I Am

I AM

What a curse it is to be able to feel
everything,
and nothing at all.
Endless string of thoughts,
keeping me up through the night.
Worry after worry after worry.
Anticipation
and then panic.

How cruel is life?
To burden someone
and make them walk this earth,
with a heavy heart.
Then take away their one source of peace.

But with the sunrise,
the worry gone
and numbness ensues.
Tearing my skin.
To feel something.
To feel anything.
No matter how deep,
how painful,
I feel nothing.

And what’s left?
Scars.
Many,
A reminder of desperation.
Hurting the outside to heal what’s within.
Few,
A reminder of hopelessness.
A failed attempt to leave and find peace.
Except one.
The irony in carving “I AM NOTHING” into my skin
Just to be left with
“I AM”.


This poem was written anonymously

See more of our poetry here.

Photo by Christopher Sardegna on Unsplash

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